Pedalling with the Brakes On

​Like many children of my generation, my bicycle was an important part of every summer.  It gave me the freedom to choose where I wanted to go and the thrill of freewheeling down a steep hill with the wind on my face.   Some days I would pedal with intention aiming to get somewhere as quickly as possible, while other days I would meander around with no particular place to go but enjoying the motion and the world changing all around me.
 
Since then there have been many times in my life when I have felt that despite my best efforts I was not getting anywhere.  It seemed like I was pedalling with the brakes on.  While I am putting lots of energy in trying to move forward, I am also taking actions that prevent this from happening.  This is not necessarily about sabotaging myself so that I am unable to move forward.  It seems to have more to do with conflicting forces in the desire to change and the desire to stay the same, or at least to slow down the change.  Whatever the reason, the result is slow, or no, progress and a lot of energy being wasted.
 
Perhaps it is passion that is driving the pedals but another emotion is keeping your hands clamped on the brakes, the impulsive part of you wants to move forward while the more rational part is keeping you in check. The dreamer is peddling while the pragmatist keeps the brakes on.  Or perhaps it is the other way around. Maybe the head is driving the pedals while the heart holds on to the brakes through fear of where this might lead.
 
It is important to understand where the power to change is coming from and if it will be sustainable for the whole of the journey.  The commitment needs to be strong enough to keep you moving with plenty in reserve to get you where you want to go.  Uncertainty about either of these risks leaving you stranded.   
 
To overcome resistance we need to know what this energy is drawing upon.  Without this knowledge the conflict will remain and you will be pitching the forward power against your desire to slow down, wasting energy and leading to exhaustion and frustration.  Resistance is most likely to be rooted in some degree of reluctance or fear.  A lack of commitment to the journey, uncertainty about your destination or a fear of what it might cost and what you might have to endure will keep you holding tight to the brakes irrespective of the reasons to drive forward.
 
This failure to launch is given lots of negative names and yet it may be the result of positive forces which have been set in opposition to one another.  Whatever the split it is important to understand this conflict so that it can be resolved and we can move forward into the future. 
 
For me the solution lies in the third element to this journey which is the most important of all.  The energy at the handlebars needs to be focussed not on slowing us down but on steering us safely along the right road.  Whether this takes us to a specific destination or is more a direction of travel depends upon our personal goals and ambitions. 
 
Finding the direction we really wish to go is a challenge, but once we have identified this it will be easier to resolve the conflicting forces that have kept us in one place. 
 
Maybe it is enough to set off without a definitive destination in mind, or perhaps there needs to be a detailed route with waypoints marked off along the way.  Some people like to take one day at a time while others prefer to have a life mapped out.  Whatever road we take we will always have to make regular adjustments to avoid fresh pitfalls and dangers and to respond to what may be around the corner.
 
We need to use the energy at the pedals to decide how fast we want to go and the brakes to help us avoid obstacles along the way and bring us to a halt when we arrive.  There will be times when it is a struggle to get up the hill and times when we need to get off and rest. There will also be times when we are freewheeling down that hill with our feet off the pedals, our hands off the brakes and the wind in our hair.
 
© 2017 Michael Golding