​Like many children of my generation, my bicycle was an important part of every summer.  It gave me the freedom to choose where I wanted to go and the thrill of freewheeling down a steep hill with the wind on my face.   Some days I would pedal with intention aiming to get somewhere as quickly as possible, while other days I would meander around with no particular place to go but enjoying the motion and the world changing all around me.
 
Since then there have been many times in my life when I have felt that despite my best efforts I was not getting anywhere.  It seemed like I was pedalling with the brakes on.  While I am putting lots of energy in trying to move forward, I am also taking actions that prevent this from happening.  This is not necessarily about sabotaging myself so that I am unable to move forward.  It seems to have more to do with conflicting forces in the desire to change and the desire to stay the same, or at least to slow down the change.  Whatever the reason, the result is slow, or no, progress and a lot of energy being wasted.
 
Perhaps it is passion that is driving the pedals but another emotion is keeping your hands clamped on the brakes, the impulsive part of you wants to move forward while the more rational part is keeping you in check. The dreamer is peddling while the pragmatist keeps the brakes on.  Or perhaps it is the other way around. Maybe the head is driving the pedals while the heart holds on to the brakes through fear of where this might lead.
 
It is important to understand where the power to change is coming from and if it will be sustainable for the whole of the journey.  The commitment needs to be strong enough to keep you moving with plenty in reserve to get you where you want to go.  Uncertainty about either of these risks leaving you stranded.   
 
To overcome resistance we need to know what this energy is drawing upon.  Without this knowledge the conflict will remain and you will be pitching the forward power against your desire to slow down, wasting energy and leading to exhaustion and frustration.  Resistance is most likely to be rooted in some degree of reluctance or fear.  A lack of commitment to the journey, uncertainty about your destination or a fear of what it might cost and what you might have to endure will keep you holding tight to the brakes irrespective of the reasons to drive forward.
 
This failure to launch is given lots of negative names and yet it may be the result of positive forces which have been set in opposition to one another.  Whatever the split it is important to understand this conflict so that it can be resolved and we can move forward into the future. 
 
For me the solution lies in the third element to this journey which is the most important of all.  The energy at the handlebars needs to be focussed not on slowing us down but on steering us safely along the right road.  Whether this takes us to a specific destination or is more a direction of travel depends upon our personal goals and ambitions. 
 
Finding the direction we really wish to go is a challenge, but once we have identified this it will be easier to resolve the conflicting forces that have kept us in one place. 
 
Maybe it is enough to set off without a definitive destination in mind, or perhaps there needs to be a detailed route with waypoints marked off along the way.  Some people like to take one day at a time while others prefer to have a life mapped out.  Whatever road we take we will always have to make regular adjustments to avoid fresh pitfalls and dangers and to respond to what may be around the corner.
 
We need to use the energy at the pedals to decide how fast we want to go and the brakes to help us avoid obstacles along the way and bring us to a halt when we arrive.  There will be times when it is a struggle to get up the hill and times when we need to get off and rest. There will also be times when we are freewheeling down that hill with our feet off the pedals, our hands off the brakes and the wind in our hair.
 
© 2017 Michael Golding

Everybody feels anxious from time to time.   Common examples are the feelings young people get before taking an exam, while many adults feel anxious before giving a speech.  Performance nerves can help us to focus, but for many of us these feelings get in the way of our enjoyment. 

For some people these feelings are so strong their lives are severely affected.  They start to avoid certain situations, particularly those involving other people, which can result in them becoming isolated and withdrawn.
 
There can be long term physical effects from high levels of anxiety such as eczema and other skin disorders and muscular tension can lead to back and neck pain or headaches.  There can also be a general exhaustion particularly when our sleep is affected.
 
Symptoms of Anxiety
Anxiety is often felt in the chest and throat, affecting our breathing which can become short and shallow.  This can lead to feeling light-headed and a sense of separation from our surroundings as if we were in our own little bubble.  Our voice may be become cracked or shaky, higher in pitch or we might lose our voice altogether. 
 
Levels of Anxiety
We all expect to feel some anxiety before an important event.  We notice it building then peak as the event gets under way.  We would then expect the feelings to fade once the event is over.
 
For some people this peak can be excessive and very hard to manage.  They may start to feel out of control and may find their hands shaking and their voices becoming croaky.  This limits their ability to perform effectively and affects their enjoyment.   Over time it may significantly affect their wellbeing.
 
There are also people who are in a permanently agitated state.  For them any temporary increase in anxiety comes at a high price with all of the expected symptoms being significantly exaggerated and therefore much harder to manage.  It may also take much longer for the feelings to subside.
 
Free Floating Anxiety
When these feelings come upon us without a recognisable source they are referred to as free-floating anxiety.  The cause is hard to pin down and it can be unpredictable as there are no clear triggers.  This may be rooted in not feeling safe as a child growing up or losing someone, such as a parent or partner, who created a feeling of safety. 
 
Being in a stressful situation for a long period can also cause such feelings to become a permanent part of our lives.  Having this anxiety always in the background is challenging for us and when an anxiety provoking situation occurs our feelings can go off the scale.
 
Panic Attacks
A panic attack is particularly unpleasant and very upsetting for the person experiencing it and those around them at the time.   It can be so disturbing that the fear of having such an attack can dominate people’s lives.  People have described the sensation as being like having a heart-attack with particular emphasis on being unable to breathe.  Some people fear they will collapse while others have an overwhelming impulse to run away.  In both cases there is fear of losing physical control.
 
My understanding is that people become overwhelmed to the point where they cannot contain their emotions.  This may be the result of a single event or an accumulation of circumstances with the final trigger being something that seems almost trivial to an outsider.
 
Managing Anxiety
I believe there are two aspects to successfully dealing with anxiety. First learning to manage the feelings in real time when they occur, and then exploring the origins of these feelings and identifying their triggers. 
 
Many successful techniques are based on feeling grounded.  Deep breathing with a short inward breath and a long outward breath increases our feelings of calm.  The physical sensation of being grounded can come from touching solid objects and feeling the ground beneath our feet.  Awareness of our body and its physical surroundings through movement may also counter feelings of being out of control and disconnected.
 
For people who are experiencing an underlying level of anxiety that seems to have no obvious cause it might be helpful to reflect upon aspects of your life which were unsettling and particularly any recent changes.  Counsellors are trained to work with people to explore the origins of these feelings and to help them develop strategies to manage their symptoms as they occur.
 
© 2017 Michael Golding